A Request For Women’s Opinions On Submission And Discipline
As regular readers here know, I’ve had several posts on hypergamy from a Biblical point of view. I have taken the unpopular position that hypergamy isn’t an evolutionary development in women, but is rather part of God’s judgment on women contained in Genesis 3:16. I’ve posted multiple times on this, The Reason Feminists Don’t Talk About Eve and more recently, Hypergamy and Genesis 3:16 A Man Must Be Fit To Rule.
Essentially, I make the argument that women respond to men and a woman will only have desire (true sexual desire) for a man who she determines is fit to rule over her. I loosely define “fit to rule” as being a confident, masculine and dominant man who embodies good character traits such as honesty, loyalty, courage, faithfulness and wisdom. I say loosely because different women are attracted to different things, but in general all women are attracted to masculine, confidently dominant men.
Based on my understanding of what Genesis 3:16 says, I believe it’s incumbent upon a man to develop himself and become fit to rule because God said that a woman’s desire will be for a man who is fit to rule over her. As a result I’ve written a half-dozen posts or more on that subject encouraging men to maximize their potential.
Then comes the tricky question of a woman’s submission. I’ve frequently made the point that submission isn’t obedience. Obedience is following the rules, submission is accepting accountability for one’s actions and the consequences for violating the rules. And, as I’ve pointed out before, the only examples of how Christ loves His church involve spanking. Revelation 3:19 is the clearest and most succinct.
“Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline. Be zealous therefore and repent!”
Specific to physical discipline, in You Need To Be Spanked I made the point that
Women are attracted to dominance and men are attracted to submission. Attraction is the coin of the realm and as a rule, a woman chooses to submit to a man based on her attraction to him. The willing submission to physical discipline is the ultimate expression of both dominance and submission. All other things being equal, if he has what it takes, she will choose to submit herself to that. If he does not, she will not willingly do so.
I also made the point in 50 Shades of Biblical Marriage that the rules on marriage (taken from the Bible) actually read like a BDSM-style D/s relationship contract. In other words, a Biblical marriage pretty much requires a dominant man because the woman is commanded to be a submissive over and over again.
Not Everyone Agrees
Commenter Cybersith1 claims women are demon-infested and won’t willingly submit to a man’s authority.
women have an inbuilt Jezebelic demonic rebellious attitude towards male authority and will NEVER willingly submit.
In addition, his position is that men don’t have any responsibility in whether a woman desires to submit to her man.
“I believe that women should be in submission regardless of whether a man is worthy enough or not… Man doesn’t have to be “fit to rule” over women, he IS fit to rule over women PERIOD”
(I read that to some wives I know and their response was peals of laughter.)
Even though his argument is incoherent (is he advocating beating them into submission?), it’s a common theme amongst a certain flavor of churchians. They can’t understand why women find them unattractive, they claim women should be attracted to them because they’re “godly men” and then they get upset when it doesn’t happen. And the ones who managed to get married get really upset when their wife won’t submit to them, which usually means “have sex with him”. As a rule she doesn’t want to because she finds his “servant leadership” and “mutual submission” repulsive. Castrated males are simply repulsive.
In my response to his argument I related an example of my experience with women and submission (if they’re attracted to me they don’t have any problem with submission), but I thought it would be good for the women to chime in on this. Especially those of you who blog about this sort of thing.
So, if any of you women readers would care to offer your thoughts on submission and discipline, why you might or might not want to submit to your man and what that might involve, go to the argument room with Cybersith1 and do so in the comments there. He seems to be the sort of man who listens to women.
Yet you continue to use ad hominem slurs against my character and to blatantly LIE about my position re your article here and in Toad’s argument Hall, where your continual use of personal pronouns referring to me personally is evident….In fact it’s downright slander and unbecoming from a purported follower of Christ
Your foundation has never been the plain meaning of scripture, instead as I have claimed before, your foundation is “game” “50 shades of grey” and the philosophy of the world
This does not absolve the man from taking responsibility to be a loving, caring husband that deserves respect etc, but her obedience is not conditional….Toad wants it to be conditional so he can uphold his “game” philosophy
We have opinions lots them. But we lack useful observations or rational conclusions
Can I send you my OkCupid profile and my phone number will you help me find a good husband ?
Up and saw a lot of BHI stuff. If your mocking me then well play and thank you
notAND SPANKED THEM WHEN THEY NEEDED IT.”Because she is an adult, not a child still in development. She is an heir with Jesus Christ as a child of God and an heir together with man of grace. What is a man supposed to do with a rebellious and contentious wife? Jesus asks for our obedience and submission. He said “Follow me.” Does a man have a right to his wife’s submission? Yes. Can he force it? Not legally, and if it has to be forced, it’s not worth it. Go ahead, beat your wife into submission. You miss the mark of a glorious marriage in Jesus (Ephesians 5:27) Jesus pours out the Spirit of the Holy Ghost on HIs Bride. What Spirit are you instilling in your wife when you beat her? Jesus died for His wife to make her whole. To heal her. To redeem her. If your wife is totally out of control, then yes, rebuke her, and then if she still refuses to obey, separation seems the best avenue to pursue.